Opinions on Relationships

No, I don't mean BGR. I meant relationships. Human relationships. More specifically, relationships between loved ones like friends and family. In my world God, my family and my friends are the most important aspects of my life. God being the first, family second and friends ranked third. I don't rely on my friends a lot but they are still crucial to my life because without them, my life would be pretty boring. In fact, dare I say that sometimes I believe my interaction with them shapes who I am. After all, I see them three quarters of the day in school. Imagine how sad school would be if I had no friends.

Respect is a key ingredient to a good relationship. I know this is a cliche but it is a cliche for a reason. It is very true. However, respect goes both ways. It has to be earned but it is more fragile than a glass vase. Respect can also be lost in a blink of an eye. However, when it comes to the topic of respect, I have to clear a HUGE misunderstanding. Just because you are older or hold a higher position, it doesn't mean the other party has to show you respect while you push them around like dogs. Like I said, respect goes both ways.

"We have two ears and one mouth so we can listen twice as much as we speak" -Epictetus

I am sure a lot of you have come across this very famous quote. It is short, simple and straight forward. Everyone says that you can tell how good a relationship is by the way communication happens within the relationship. Listening is a large part of communication. In fact, without listening and giving impervious responses, you could be hinting that you don't care. Also, the ability to listen leads to respect.

Everyone has their fair share of disagreements in a relationship. Be it between lovers or friends or families, there will be disagreements. Do you just sit on it and let it die? No. You don't. Waiting for a problem to disappear might just be as well as waiting for the relationship to be done and over. Disagreements happen because two parties cannot come to unanimous decision but when you just listen, you would be able to come up with ways to compromise or even come up with a situation where both parties win. Every relationship has it troubles but sometimes, being able to talk it out is good for the relationship. If you ask me, I'd rather have friendships that aren't smooth. At least that way we would have a chance to improve both ourselves and the relationship. Although my boyfriend and I care about each other a lot, we still get into heated arguments sometimes but when we calm ourselves down and lay down everything we are unhappy about, it actually makes us feel better.

Our relationships define our identity as well. For me, I am a christian a daughter, a cousin, a friend, a girlfriend, a student and etc. Sure it does sound like I have split personalities but they are all me. With different roles in my relationships with different people sometimes it is hard to strike a balance. Sometimes my mother complains I spend too much time with my friends while I complain to my boyfriend that we don't get to hang out a lot. Sometimes I feel that I spend too much time at church and neglect my roles as a student. Honestly, without God's blessings I'd probably have flunked and dropped out of High School a long time ago. However, it is always to strike a balance. It doesn't mean to divide your time b/w all your roles but it means putting your roles in priority then diffuse the time you spend as that role. Since I put being a Christian as my top priority, I do actually love spending more time with God.

Basically there is a balance in every relationship and how we handle it is always important.